Shark Week (Day 6)

To conclude:

SHARK FACT: There are over 400 different kinds of sharks known.  While a lot of similar traits unite them as a species (dermal denticle, cartilaginous skeleton, a weakness for devil's food cake), there are many significant differences.

Appearance:
Most sharks can be differentiated by simply looking at them.  Whale sharks, for instance, are known for their immense size, sometimes exceeding 35 ft.  In fact, the whale shark got its name from its resemblance-in-size of an elephant, the whale of dry land.

Goblin sharks are also easily recognizable, because they are ugly as shit.  Looking like the bastard child of a narwhal, the Cloverfield monster, and something I puked up after that tenth shot of El Toro, the goblin shark was likely teased during its youth.  This likely scarred the goblin shark, and in later years, couldn't keep a steady job and turned to heroin for comfort.

There's not much to say about hammerhead sharks...

Speed:
In case sheer appearance is too easy of a shark identifier for you, speed is another alternative.  The shortfin mako shark is considered the fastest shark, can swim at over 30 mph.  While that might seem like a feet in and of itself, the mako shark can also smoke twice the amount of marijuana of Michael Phelps.


Diet:
The way a shark eats can also tell a lot about the shark itself.  As stated a couple of days ago, tiger sharks will eat almost anything.  The only problem with this all-you-can-eat style is that the tiger shark doesn't tip very well.

Angel sharks are much sneakier about their feasting.  Rather than chase prey all over the ocean like a deadly game of tag, angel sharks lay flat on the ocean floor, camouflaging themselves, and wait for their food to swim nearby.  In this way, I can empathize with the angel shark, because that is exactly what I do with my food, as well.